Green Bananas

My unripe self-love is overcome by the flaws I find, I search for.
I long to soothe, to sing myself to sleep, but 1AM stretches out
Longer than a day.

The greenness of the relationship I have with myself
Is ever so slightly warming up.
A colour of yellow or orange or maybe even a tint of red.

I try to hold all the pieces together until they are ready;
Until the glue between the cracks is just a little bit harder,
Just a little bit stronger.

You take out my hair-dryer from the bottom drawer
And offer to help harden the glue;
Ripen my self-love.

/michal

Silence

I hear the clock, I hear your breath.
I hear the birds, unbound by time.
The cars go by on the one-way street
All headed to the same place (somewhere far).

I hear my thoughts.
I hear the wind.
(I wonder if they are the same).
I wish to breathe, to remain still,
But the future whispers impatiently my name.

/michal

Part II: De-Compartments

To love the entirety of you
In its unified fusion
(To me, to yourself?)
Your outlined shadow full
(Soft)
I care not
About the holes in you.
I care only
For the whole of you.

/michal

Part I: Compartments

To love each part of you
Even those unknown
(To me, to you?)
Their outlined shadows fill your soul
(Soft)
I fear not
To know you.
I fear
Not to know you.

/michal

Biology or Prison

I look at you and notice
The cells we’ve made
(Or found)
That contain us

Alone. I look at my hands
And wonder if they’re strong enough
To break my cell
And everyone else’s too.
A hand that prides itself on softness.

When I close my eyes,
The cell remains.
When I breathe for myself,
The cell dissolves.
Let me catch my breath for a moment.
Let me feel that I am temporary.

/michal

Shifting Clouds

Like carrying a preventative umbrella on a sunny day
I tell you my flaws before you kiss me
Because you never know
If they’ll want to know you
(who’s they?
are they flaws?
are they flawed?)

/michal

Reinventing the Mirror

I evade myself
To find someone better.
Perhaps in another,
Perhaps in a lie.

/michal

Allegories and Other Mistakes

I dance into another
Heavily trying to be light.
But he laughs at everything I say
Smiling
Forgiving of – or oblivious to –
The me inside of me, hiding.

/michal

Connection

I’m not sure what was my
Intention
When I exposed to you this
Extension
Of myself, told to you unapologetically

/michal

Excess

It is not a question of
Whether you were enough
Or not,
Too much,
Or not.

You exceed quantities, go beyond
Into questions of
Whether you were fitting,
My self with yours
Or not,
Fits too well,
Or not.

These are questions of relation
Which means there are two
Trying to be one,
Or not.

So question not your worth
For it exceeds my words
And consumes me
To propel me forward,
Or not.

/michal